Archive
Monthly Archives: August 2006
Monthly Archives: August 2006
Do it quickly after you have reached a goal. The rewards are most effective if immediate. Plus it creates the break you want right then, not tomorrow.
Allow time for yourself when doing for others. Sometimes we can get so wrapped up in doing things for others that we bypass ourselves. This can feed stress build up. Treat yourself to a self moment periodically.
Do it often. This can depend on the size of the reward. Do small things often and larger ones less frequently but regularly.
Vary the rewards. Remember they are meant to be special. But of course only you can decide this. If taking time for sipping a cup of coffee each day is enjoyable, fine. But do add some variety also.
Break the routine of your tasks. Maybe allow yourself one part of a day to not do what you had scheduled.
Space the rewards somewhat evenly with in your tasks so that you don’t get stuck in long periods without an attitude lift.
Also, space the work out evenly within the rewards; don’t allow yourself to put off the more difficult parts to the end. You will be setting yourself up for stress and meltdown, or avoidance!
Don’t punish yourself for having to do what you have chosen, you can choose to enjoy the process.
John
“One characteristic of winners is they always look upon
themselves as a do it yourself project.”
— Denis Waitley
There is a seemingly small thing that you can be doing to yourself that makes things less enjoyable.
It can determine the difference in how you feel while you are doing something laborious or difficult, trying to accomplish something, or even affect your overall disposition.
It’s how you treat yourself, or how you don’t treat yourself.
Do you tend to be a taskmaster with yourself?
Do you allow yourself to feel rushed and stressed, and thinking there is no time for yourself to enjoy what you are doing?
Many times when we are faced with doing something that we have decided is absolutely necessary, we get so intense with it that we are not just not happy, we are noticeably unhappy.
Who says that we must be unhappy, even when we are doing something that we think is important?
Feeling bad about what you must do is like punishing yourself for doing it.
It may actually be hard but hard does not mean bad or negative.
Everything is not easy, so learn to enjoy it all.
Remember that life is a process.
So when you are working on changing yourself, or you trying to accomplish something, don’t be so hard on yourself.
Who says you have to be miserable during the process before you have changed or accomplished what you want?
Why not reward yourself as you go along.
This can help reduce the stress of a lengthy process, but actually it can help you actually come to enjoy the process you are in.
You want to do more than just remove the negative feelings, that would just bring you to neutral, rather you want to add the positive happy feelings.
You can purposefully build in a rewards system for yourself.
Set smaller goals within the larger task of project as points where you can pull away from the intensity for a bit and enjoy something.
This also gives you the feeling of accomplishment sooner than waiting for the whole thing to be done.
Choose carefully what to use for your reward, make sure it is not something that will bring on additional problems or stress.
Don’t use eating a huge meal if overeating is something you are watching.
Or don’t go drinking with your buddies if your wife is already edgy about you doing it.
Maybe you usually rush at breakfast, take one day to take your time.
Allow yourself a long lunch with a friend.
Go out and do something fun that you have been putting off.
Anything that breaks the flow and that gives you a little joy will work wonders for your attitude and enjoyment of the life process.
And remember, the more time you think about something the more affect it will have on your life.
So, work on your daily enjoyment from both ends, reduce the poor stressed attitude and increase the happy one.
John
“Enjoyment is not a goal, it is a feeling that accompanies
important ongoing activity.” — Paul Goodman
“Not what we have but what we enjoy, constitutes our
abundance.” — John Petit-Senn
“Once we discover how to appreciate the timeless values in
our daily experiences, we can enjoy the best things in
life.” — Harry Hepner
“Losers live in the past. Winners learn from the past and enjoy working in the present toward the future.” — Dennis Waitley
Be absolutely determined to enjoy what you do.
–Gerry Sikorski
Have you thought about how your life is a mirror, reflecting what you think?
This has been stated in different ways:
A mirror,
A reflection,
Evidence,
Expression,
Manifestation,
You are what you think, you get what you project.
Your thinking, your state of mind and your actions always elicit a response in your life, continuously -all the time, everything – always.
Your power comes with your ability to take command of your thought and actions.
This is how you have influence on your life’s experience.
If you allow your mind to be a “random action machine,” you will get random results that you must then deal with.
Take notice of what you are doing and the results you are living with? Are they what you really want?
Why not take charge of your thinking and learn to direct it in ways that support your purpose, your deep inner feelings about what you should be doing with your life.
When you are noticing that there are things going on in your life that you are not so pleased with, take a look at yourself.
Ask, “what can I think and do differently that will affect what I experience?”
Your ability to think about what you want whenever you want, is the result of your self-discipline being in command over random thought.
Here is a poem by William Arthur Ward that clearly states what you can do to see specific results.
Truths For Living
William Arthur Ward
The more generous we are,
the more joyous we become.
The more cooperative we are,
the more valuable we become.
The more enthusiastic we are,
the more productive we become.
The more serving we are,
the more prosperous we become.
The more outgoing we are,
the more helpful we become.
The more curious we are,
the more creative we become.
The more patient we are,
the more understanding we become.
The more persistent we are,
the more successful we become.
Doesn’t that do something to put it in perspective?
Action – Reaction,
Input – output,
Your purposeful thought and action precede the evidence you want.
This poem is a mini self-improvement guide if you’re looking to reduce stress and anxiety, and increase your happiness, joy, and fulfillment.
Don’t go looking at the reflection, the evidence, to change without your changing.
John
“The universe is transformation: our life is what our thoughts make it. — Marcus Aurelius
“We make a living by what we get, we make a life by what we give.” — Winston Churchill
“How we spend our days is, of course, how we spend our lives.” — Anne Dillard”
What is your mind doing all day long when you are doing what you do?
It is very common to find yourself asking yourself questions, which is a very powerful personal growth tool that you should be using.
If that is, if you want to discover ways to improve your life and reduce your stress and anxiety.
But, many times the questions that you are asking yourself are more of the negative vein.
Like-
Why does this always happen to me?
What is wrong with me?
Why don’t they like me?
Why is it always so hard for me?
Why can’t I always screw up?
Why do they do this to me?
Now, can see that these seem innocent enough, but they are actually very damaging if you persist with this line of questioning.
It is actually a form of complaining.
When you continuously repeat those kinds of questions you are just reinforcing what you don’t want.
These are actually negative affirmations that you are hammering in to your mind.
There is a way to reverse this negative thought bombardment on your mind.
You need to become aware of your mind chatter and what you say to yourself all day long.
This way you will catch these innocent questions early before repeating them for a time.
Now these are natural questions that come up when you are in certain situations, this is natural.
But the trick is to quickly flop them around to an opposite positive statement of something you do want.
Then when you say this positive statement or question you are actually seeking a solution based response from your inner self and the universe.
Such as-
What can I do to help them to like me?
What is the best way to do this?
What can I do to do this well?
What outcome do I want with this?
How can I get the outcome I want?
What can I do right now to change the way I think about this?
Of course you can get more specific to the situation at hand.
Flipping a negative question is easy, just rewrite it based on what you want.
With any thing you don’t want, like, have, feel or do – you can then look to its opposite – what you do want.
That is what you should be keeping your mind on.
Your subconscious and the universe responds to your thoughts.
Take command of your thoughts and guide your life experience to how you want it.
John
“Whatever commands our time, energy and resources, commands
us.” — Tom Sine
“He who cannot command himself should obey. And many can command themselves, but much is still lacking before they can obey themselves.” — Friedrich Nietzsche
“The answers you receive
depend upon the questions you ask.” — Thomas Kuhn
“Great minds ask great questions.” — Michael Gelb
“If we would have new knowledge, we must get a whole world
of new questions.” — Susanne K. Langer
“Every clarification breeds new questions.” — Arthur Bloch
“The word question is derived from the Latin quarrier (to seek)
which is the same root as the word for quest. A creative life is
a continued quest, and good questions can be very useful guides.
Most useful are open-ended questions; they allow for fresh
unanticipated answers to reveal themselves.” — Source Unknown
“Asking the proper question is the central action of
transformation… Questions are the key that cause the secret
doors of the psyche to swing open.” — Clarissa Pinkola Estes